Into the Deep

The red twinkling led lights along the concrete barrier in the middle of the highway, like so many enraged fairies, inform me.

The wheeling flock of starlings, disappearing into the west, flying as one bird as they leave for their other home, inform me.

The lingering dark in the mornings which has not yet touched the sunset twilight informs me.

It is the time of the New Moon in Pisces.

As Sun and Moon gather in the final sign of the zodiac, I feel an urge to dive deep. The waters beckon, warmly promising to enfold my soul.

It is at this time of year that – as I see the signs of Winter approaching all around me – I feel a tender joy in actually experiencing the cant of the sun in his decline. Time to gather the harvest, time to see to the flocks. Time to ensure that you have provision enough to see you through the harsher months ahead.

Unlike birds, who seem able to plug into their species group soul almost at will, human animals seem proud of their individuality. We cherish it, often to the point where the individuation is seen as a needful thing – this marking out of little pieces of the One into me, and you, and thou.

I’m starting to appreciate that we have lost something of tremendous worth through this process of being individuals, though. When we need to know the way, when our compasses need affirming, when we have questions seemingly unresolved – then would we benefit from the limitless ocean of the source from which we came, to which we ultimately belong, and into whose arms we are headed at the close of our little human plays of incarnation.

This time of deepening water, when the dark gathers its power and speaks strongly to us, is perhaps a time to pause, slow down, take stock of our roots and leaves and branches, and maybe – just perhaps – become our own Messiahs.


16 responses to “Into the Deep

  1. Ok..let’s try this again..I knew there was something special about this New Moon. Thanks for reminding me, Terri.The ocean is a great way to visualise the Radiant Darkness. Lovely post, T..thanks.


  2. Isn’t the goal to transend the individuality, and regain what we lost, bringing the old consciousness together with our new “ego” and becoming something even better …. ?If that makes sense?peace and love!


  3. At the moment, Abraxas, that seems to be the goal after we die.For we the living , maybe we should be looking to stop the cutting away of the living tissue from underneath our feet.For without matter, there is no spirit.Love,TerriPS howzit Donald!


  4. “… after we die” Isn’t it more evolution in progress? ie we the living must achieve this “merge”? I’m certainly no expert, but i thought living was developing, and after you are dead you … reflect(?)”For without matter, there is no spirit” …now i’m confused, surely spirit stands without matter? Matter merely being the form through which matter can act, or manifest? … one of several forms available?peace


  5. No, I’m afraid I’m going to fundamentally disagree with you on this one, Abraxas.To me, (and many others I would guess) Spirit and Matter are so interdependant that one cannot exist without the other.Each is deeply entwined in the other, such that killing off one means killing off all.This is why the Earth as a habitat is so important.I know most Buddhists would disaggree with me, but i’m no Buddhist.The Earth is, for us, primary.She contains a record of all that we ever have been and a template of all that we ever could be.It’s a cop out, as i see it, to rely on Spirit and Transendence alone. It’s a bit like an escape valve. But I don’t believe that it works.If we shatter the matter, we leave spirit dangling, and eventually dispersing, with no memory of Life.Love,Terri


  6. Yes, there is a fundamental difference beteen our understandings … you put yours very well.Do you have any links i could read in this regard? I have much to ponder, thanks!!peace and love


  7. No, i would never do that, well, not this time at least.I have utmost respect for you as both shaman and person, and hence when you say something like this, which would make me reconsider my understanding of things, i certainly would like to learn more.peace 🙂


  8. Hmm..well it seems to me, after thinking a bit, that this is not something you can learn from reading, particularly.I base most, if not all, of my ‘beliefs’ upon my personal experiences.Derrick Jensen certainly helped radicalise my understanding of Matter as primary, but it’s much more down to the sitting, breathing, journeying and altering my brain with pineal-gland created substances that I credit my understanding of how Spirit and Matter are interdependent.It’s a doing thing, not a learning thing.Love,Terri


  9. haha, terri. i know all about wind – professional longwinder over here, for sure! but seriously, i love the special voice that your blog brings, from the unique perspective of woman/shaman/earth warrior. also, i love the very real thing that is wind (maybe the most real, powerful force out there?), and i really do think that it is the source of my inspiration. it was blowing fiercely for the past few days, and at the same time i’ve been feeling another changing coming on. also, when i’m walking out there in it, that is when the words come to me…which i quickly scribble down when i return home.the gusts have died down now….perhaps they have blown around the globe to your home, with some ideas for you to catch like airborne seeds looking for new dirt.


  10. I believe so, although not having a tv, i’m not sure ;-)The saddest of events, yet somehow hope and promise saturated it. NOT FOR NOTHING … no loss should be in vain, but some have the seeds of creating real change. We started at the chool, and ended at a muddy grave in the cemetary … emotion was high the whole day, but the total suppot and commitment to the family was phenomenal.Ours is not the why … i guess …peace and love


  11. OK, if i may revisit.E=mc2Einstein showed that scientifically, matter is energy. This echoes what i believe from the “spirit” realms too, all different forms of energy, resonating at their own frequency.Matter being the “heaviest”, almost like condensed energy.Is it’s importance as a “genetic store” or record? Similar to a crystal perhaps?perhaps this is why i am failing to understand, it’s ALL energy? Evn when you consider what we know of singularities, it was a giant injection of energy, from which matter and time and space flowed.peace 😉


  12. Oh yeah, it’s all energy, you’re right.Remeber. that’s on the incarnate plane. We may be dealing with other substrates on other planes, and almoat certainly with more dimensions.I think the point I’m making is that Matter is a special case of Spirit, just as, here, it’s a special case of energy.Also, we can transform Matter into other Matter, some of which is known as energy, on this plane. And that may show us the components of Soul.But I have a feeling that the thing we call Spirit is of another order altogether, and physics doesn’t come close to getting a handle on it.Just my interpretation, mind you.All the same, this order of thing called Matter (including energy as we know it here) and the order of thing called Spirit are not necessarily transformable, one into the other, and yet they are utterly dependent on each other for their fulfillment.Me rambling again. I undoubtedly have a lot to learn.Love,Terri in Joburg


  13. Ok, it’s the seperation of spirit and energy that i wasn’t seeing.Your view makes a lot of sense, spirit (to me) is still a great unknown … and being of a different nature entirely, would explain a lot. Although they apparently can overlap in places.One day i’ll know everything, till then i’ll keep askin’ :)peace


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